Should My Wannabe Influencer Friend Cease Using Me for Content?

The Prosecution: One Friend's Perspective

Sometimes I'm recorded while I’m eating. I’ll see myself on her social media – it’s like a sudden shock.

My best friend of a decade, she, labels herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it weighs on our friendship.

She is an extrovert, she feels the need to record everything constantly. During meals out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when strangers see her posing or filming – I get vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She's not quite an online personality yet, but she is trying to be. She creates video blogs about city life, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be involved. On occasion I'm captured while I’m eating, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her feed later, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I’ll have no makeup on, an awkward face or be captured while eating. It feels invasive.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to film her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I'm in conversation to another person, or we're simply spending time in the street. I feel like our friendship has transformed into me serving as her free crew. She has the means to employ someone if she wanted professional shots. Upon mentioning my discomfort about this arrangement, she brushed it off. I've been invited to several brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn’t make up for all the time and effort I spend assisting her create material.

I appreciate that Marielle has helped me with my design career, but I don’t want our connection to become just a ledger of exchanges. I don't believe she’s fake or inauthentic, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

Her directive is, “OK, look happy!” and record me laughing with another. It’s so silly. It's crucial her to recognize that our 10-year friendship still has boundaries. I love being with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being filmed, edited, or posted for an audience. I’m not a accessory for her online persona.

The Defence: Marielle

I hope my friend to see that the creations we make together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online allows me to show my personality and connect with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a professional creator yet, but it’s smart to generate income from your interests. I admire people on TikTok who execute that style of informal, self-made film-making.

Content creation is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the nuances, posting them with an viewership that values the art behind it. I never intend to make Beth uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, giving her a opportunity to witness exclusive moments that could help her professional path too. That’s not blackmail, it’s just being pragmatic.

I would take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see the benefits the content we create together can get us: an opening. I know not all people likes being filmed, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes content authentic. Appearing on video occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I'd remove anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anyone to be my private videographer, but companions help each other in small ways. My assumption was filming a clip now and then would be enjoyable for Beth. Creativity thrives in collaboration, and having my friend around makes projects lively and pleasurable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I record our shared experiences.

I cherish our friendship deeply and don’t want making videos to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to compromise: like requesting permission before filming, and steering clear of shots that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about control, it’s about sharing my world while still considering hers. Obviously making content is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it’s just part of how I experience life and I desire her to be involved in a way that’s enjoyable for both of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop recording herself and Beth when they are socializing?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a companion film you. I understand that it's her job, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. Given the dark, looming future of AI, personal relationships are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves creating, that doesn't imply everyone around her is willing material. She must to respect Beth’s personal space.
Ankit, 26

She may enjoy producing videos and displaying her life online, but it isn't for everyone. It’s nice she has assisted her friend professionally, but she must to hear what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It seems like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the focus in your relationship. Foster some real memories, where true emotions are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even celebrities who seem to share their worlds actually have more privacy than it appears.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be neither present nor genuine when they're together – she’s working. Both seem unsure as to what’s reasonable. The answer lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing defined limits around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an acceptable compromise.
A final view, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their friendship?

Robert Hess
Robert Hess

A seasoned business strategist with over 15 years of experience in corporate consulting and operational efficiency.